Sara Teasdale’s “I Am Not Yours” features three stanzas, each with the rime scheme ABCB. Its theme is deep, abiding love. The speaker exaggerates her desire to become one with her beloved.
First Quatrain: “I am not yours, not lost in you”
The speaker addresses her beloved in an unusual way by saying that she does not belong to him, and she is not lost in him. Lovers often exaggerate in art forms the degree to which they are part of their beloved, but she offers an original approach.
But that claim soon reverses itself when she asserts that although she is “not lost in [him],” she certainly wants to be. She then compares the state of being that she craves to “a candle lit at noon.” The light of a candle at noon would blend so equally with the natural sun light that it would hardly be visible.
She adds that she wishes for blending with her beloved as “a snowflake in the sea.” Of course, a snowflake in the sea would melt immediately, becoming one with the water. Despite the opening negative remark, the speaker has turned her claim around and even made it more intense than it would have been had she not begun by with the assertion, “I am not yours.”
Second Stanza: “You love me, and I find you still”
The second stanza affirms that the target of her affection returns her love, but her desire is for complete self-annihilation in her beloved, and even though he loves her, she is still an individual; she says, “I am I.” But as she has already demonstrated in the opening stanza, she wishes to be so consumed by her beloved that she desires to be “lost [in him] as light is lost in light.”
Third Stanza: “Oh plunge me deep in love—put out”
In the final stanza, the speaker is pleading for the realization of her desire to become totally merged with her beloved. She begs, “Oh plunge me deep in love.” She wishes to sink down into this affection so completely that she no longer needs the ability to see or hear. She thus asks that her “senses” be “swept by the tempest of your love.”
She then compares her senses to a candle that is extinguished by a gust of wind. She yearns for her beloved to absorb her so completely that she has no separate existence apart from him.
Commentary
The theme of this love lyric is a common one for lovers; pop lyrics use it over-abundantly. The idea of becoming so consumed by love that one wishes to melt into one’s lover has long been a cliché; the serious artist who employs this theme works to dramatize it in fresh, original ways.
That freshness is achieved by Teasdale in her opening remarks, “I am not yours, not lost in you” and her use of light as the substance to which she compares her desired union with her beloved. She avoids all of the tired and obnoxious sexual connotations that usually appear in portrayals of this theme. This lyric’s elocution remains so elevated that it could be interpreted as a devotee’s prayer to the Divine.
Another Teasdale Article:
Sara Teasdale’s “To E.”: A Petrarchan Sonnet
Linda Sue Grimes - As a writer, researcher, and SRF devotee, Linda Sue Grimes has studied poetry and practiced Kriya Yoga for over thirty years..
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